Don't get Sucked In - in Suzhou
Also known as "School Alert".
New English teaching schools and wanna-be Corporate Training outfits are popping up like mushrooms toadstools after a refreshing humid spring rain here in Suzhou.
BUT. Most have neither the legal authority to hire foreigners as teachers/lecturers, nor do they have a hope in hell of obtaining that authority. This, ipso facto, means that they cannot sponsor a foreigner for any type of visa.
They would just love you to wander along to classes/seminars/promotional bullshit gigs, toting whatever type of China visa you may have, be it an unfinished visa from a previous employer, or that hoary old stand-by, the Tourist visa.
Red Flag #1 
God help you if you get called in "for a chat" by "the boys" for being really naughty.
Teaching/working in China on a Tourist visa is like having regular unprotected sex with complete strangers.
It is absolutely essential for these outfits to have a specimen whitey to sing, dance, beam at the crowd, shake hands with all and sundry.
You would have thought that Jamieson's finely honed "scamometer" (TM, Pat. Pend.) would have gone way into the red line area, complete with "scam alert" Klaxons.
A thorough assessment of the glossy brochure provided by the would-be scammer(s) had lovely smiling images of former colleagues at Suzhou University - we were all working for what was a reasonable Department.
Jamieson mentioned "Hey, I know these folks personally. I even recommended one for a position in the Department" (and he was promptly hired by the University).
Nervous shuffling of feet by the management.
"Where's so & so ?" Jamieson asks politely.
"Ahhhh, he had to return to Australia for visa reasons - damn near deported." (Why ? Couldn't you organise a visa for him ?)
Red Flag #2
"How about Such & Such ?" "Tied up with other jobs, but still takes classes when required"
Red Flag #3
"Bullshitometer" (TM, Pat. Pend.) now smoking due to bullshit overload of the system.
Now I'm seeing :
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Any Western "Manager" who rants and raves at Chinese employees - in public and amongst their peers is riding for a fall.
Any Western "Manager" who calls their Chinese employee(s) "fucking useless, incompetent" etc. in front of other Chinese staff (and in front of me) is guilty of one of the most serious violations of employee management protocol in the whole of the People's Republic of China.
Then this particluar organisation has the temerity to offer "Employee Management Skills Training", "Management Techniques for Junior and mid-level Manager" courses.
Chinese feelings run deep, and they have extremely long memories.
Completely stripping a relatively junior and inexperienced Chinese employee of "face" in public might well result in you having an unplanned visit to the Emergency Room with about 19 rather nasty & deep stab wounds to the abdomen, neck and face.
I tell you what Dear Reader, China is NOT the place to experiment with bombastic and humiliating public diatribes against Chinese employees.
Here's the 'thing' in China.
Young "faceless" Leroy over there wearing the suit and trembling whenever Captain Bullshit starts another frothing tirade may well have an uncle who has a friend who has unsavoury friends - ad infinitum.
Mrs. Jamieson assures Jamieson that she indeed does have ongoing family relationships with relatives from Anhui who are part of the "Anhui Diaspora" across China.
Originating from Anhui no longer carries its former stigma. In fact, there are (surprisingly) officials (from Anhui) at most levels of Government and it has been "infiltrated".
To demonstrate that the Anhui stigmata is well and truly healed - look to the very summit of the Chinese Communist Party Leadership, a *rather* famous yet modest chap called Hu Jin Tao.
a.k.a. President of the People's Republic of China, elected on March 15, 2003....Hu Jintao, a native of Jixi, Anhui Province ......
Mrs. Jamieson reassures me that "One phone call is all it takes" to unfurl the revenge umbrella. I'm not by any means implying that she has a hotline to Beijing - but Anhui family & distant associates is a very powerful concept.
...and a quick chat in the village dialect to those in the know - galvanises immediate support.
Folks from Anhui are the type to punch,kick and stab first - then ask questions later. Some commentators refer to them as "Pimps, Goons and Thieves", which is rather a cliched overstatement, but a valid perception at times.
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You simply cannot arrive in China and use a "Treat them like 'Kaffers' " mentality.
Now, which country uses a derogatory term like 'Kaffers' ? Jamieson wonders to himself.
Do yourself a huge favour : Watch out for funny accents and those with on-line MBAs granted using "life experience" and USD$6,000 as the sole criteria.
You've been warned. I escaped.